public service announcement – stay in school
Admittedly this should have been our “back to school” video in September, but I’d forgotten all about it until seeing Shanna’s cheery face in today’s photo selection. So yes, here’s our little girl lost in the land she lives (to Shanna’s defense, she was able to correctly identify the whereabouts of California, Texas, and Florida, although none of these achievements are shown here). Call us big meanies, cans of spotted dick, whatever … it’s not like we’d grilled her to rattle off all those independent sovereign splinters of the former Soviet Union, like the Stans and all their cousins, e.g. Georgia, Ukraine, Moldova, some random ass place called Azerbaijan (are you fucking kidding me?), and a host of other confusing names and places. Shit, you know, people were all giddy when the Iron Curtain finally collapsed in 1991, but maybe the geographic world was better off when students could just sweep all that land under the formidable and largely unknown mass that was the U.S.S.R. and leave it at that. I mean, independence is cool and all, hooray for you, but why not just keep it simple for everyone here in the U.S. that’s just trying to get by with a decent enough grade to not have to work the late shift at McDonalds? Be cool, that’s all I’m saying.
more shanna
Johnny Knoxville, Dimitry, and Shanna aboard the USS Nimitz aircraft carrier in 2008.
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I know I said this was to be an informal week of edjumacation about the world around you, but let's take a break from exploring all the flora and fauna to peek beneath the bagged-out skirt of Mother Russia.
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You've heard of "Girl Drink Drunk," right? Well, that has nothing at all to do with this video (directed and produced by our very own Shanna Zablow), but after watching Travis Pastrana try to throw a football on the sidelines of Nitro Circus it was the first phrase that popped into my head.
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One of the perks of living in Los Angeles is that you can source out most any deplorable thing or service. Take X-rated cakes, for instance. We've ordered up a lot of really awful and ugly creations over the years: wide open beavers, meaty cocks, homo-hetero curveballs
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happy birthday, shanna!
Sure, we could have posted up that she’s now 38-years-old, but what’s the point of that? Especially when she’s not and she’d probably (no, make that definitely) kick my ass up and down Sunset Blvd. until I walked like some of those shmen that awkwardly strut the blocks over on Santa Monica Blvd. in their high heels. Shanna’s not the resident lioness of Dickhouse for nothing, so if you know what’s good for you, you’ll post up your birthday wishes for the Purple Pony princess accordingly. Happy Birthday, Shanna! (more…)
I know it looks like we're jumping on the butt of the South Carolina bandwagon along with every other reputable news organization on the planet, but I swear this is purely a coincidence. How so? Well, for one, we're always a bridesmaid and never a bride.
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One of the fringe benefits of the jackassworld mailbag program is that our community often sends us toys that are, in turn, used to generate content for the website. Why, I believe it was Amanda who first sent us a canister of Silly String—the very same can that generated the hit jackassworld video "Rick Rage."
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With the "See You Sunday" clips spilling out in rapid, daily succession this week, I've somehow gotta get rid of my excess shots from that night, so here you go. It's fancy pants flip book time again. There's something for everyone here, I believe (even Marciano!)
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The other week I had a few family members in town and decided to ask for (and got) a day off from work. But while I was gone my office members decided to play a prank on me. And from what I hear they have never worked harder on anything.
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