jackassworld

“well, mine’s working, because i’ve got a bloody dick on mine!”
—tim campbell, troubleshooting the beta jackassworld pranks application

“i’m gonna take a piss, do some push-ups, and then i’ll take care of that.”
—cordell mansfield, on the way to achieving 700 push-ups in one day

“is everyone in your family as hot as you?”
—steve-o, regarding cordell mansfield

“i once watched the flowbee commercial on acid and totally tripped out.”
—chris pontius

“i can’t pull the mail out of my ass.”
—mike g., when rick kosick wanted to film a mailbag even though there wasn’t any mail

“there’s only room for one star … and you’ve got a pussy the size of the grand canyon.”
—rick kosick, simultaneously stroking and bullying wolfie into dressing up as “wolferine” for the wild whites premiere in los angeles

“you’re the mark hamill of jackassworld.”
—sean cliver to wolfie

“the only time i get recognized is in the drive-thru.”
—street bike tommy, of nitro circus

“i like pussy. dicks are old news.”
—rick kosick, regarding having footage of girls on the website

“the best part about shooting at a contest for big brother is that i haven’t even turned my camera to the course once!”
—lauren graham, at the recent maloof cup

“there were some bands that wanted to kill me … let me think about it.”
—chris nieratko, when asked about his interview style for big brother

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