jackassworld

The one thing I cherish about jackassworld is the sense of global community and goodwill shared here. From Taiwan to Australia, Germany to the United Kingdom, Brazil to Hungary, Mianus to Yerpenis, virtually all of the continental bases are covered (Antarctica excluded unless some penguin would like to step up and be counted), and we’ve all learned a good foreign cuss word or two in the process of getting to know one another. Today, however, we are going to come together as a world and celebrate the country of Canada. It is, after all, Thanksgiving in the Great White North. Wait … what, what? Thanksgiving? Are you shitting me? Fucking thieves. That’s OUR holiday. You may feel you have something similar, but c’mon, can’t you come up with your own name for it? Be original for god’s sake! But I have to admit that it would certainly appear you got the cooler boatload of pilgrims than we did—and I don’t mean that in the thermometer way. While three ships of upstanding Puritan/Quaker-types were busy crashing into the rocks at Plymouth and getting ready to spread diseases to all the good savages sunbathing onshore, the little known fourth boat—obviously filled with renegade fur-trapping alcoholics and opportunistic prostitutes—went wildly astray and ran aground somewhere up near what was later named Nova Scotia by equally drunk vagabonds from Scotland. Anyway, I’m willing to let all misgivings go if everyone else in the world is. So Happy Thanksgiving, Canada! The Wildboyz never officially ventured out upon your vast wasteland of tundra, but seeing as you’re all sitting down to eat a hearty moose dinner today with all the maple sugar fixings this was the best I could do on such short notice.

more wildboyz:

wildboyz on jackassworld