jackassworld

Here is what I’m sure will be one of many constant reminders today to keep an eye out for Steve-O on tonight’s premiere episode of ABC’s Dancing With The Stars. However, I’m also sure this will be the only one to include a leech dangling from his eyeball.

To put a little perspective on this stunt, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Steve-O may just be the only person in the history of the world to ever willingly have a leech applied to his eye. I am, of course, discounting any dead people that may have drowned in backwater rivers, because I’m sure many a waterlogged corpse has had its lifeblood sucked from it by these godforsaken parasites (in which case I’m sure a few of the runts had to settle for swollen eye capillaries).

In an evolutionary sense their existence makes sense, but if you swing to the Christian side of creationism then you really have to wonder what in the world god was thinking when he said, “And let there be leeches!” Was this, perchance, a deed committed in whimsy soon after creating peyote buttons and psilocybin mushrooms? Although if that was the altered states case, then I’m surprised there really aren’t more cartoonish fixtures in the world … then again, the Philippine Tarsier is about as Roger Rabbit as it gets, as is Tori Spelling, so who knows. Maybe god did go off on a bender prior to putting the polishing touches on the whole earthly kit and kaboodle.

(photo by Sean Cliver; Mumbai, India; 2006)

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