jackassworld

“we could spray silly string on him? based on rick’s reaction this afternoon, that might be the worst thing you can do to another human being.”
—dave carnie, when asked by johnny knoxville what bad kind of things we could do to jeff tremaine on his birthday

“jeff makes some really convincing gay faces when you stick a dick in him!”
—mat hoffman, in regard to the artwork for jeff tremaine’s car wrap that johnny knoxville made for him

“at first it was funny, but after about three hours i had some moral stirrings in my soul.”
—will etling, regarding his having to photochop jeff tremaine’s face on dozens of hardcore gay bondage photos

“those are the sloppiest, saggiest boobs i’ve ever seen on a dude.”
—jeff tremaine, regarding a dude with sloppy, saggy boobs in a restaurant

“i feel my risotto coming back up.”
—lauren, a community member, looking at the photo of the day featuring jeff tremaine in his birthday suit

“oh my god, there’s stuff in here that i wish I could just unsee but i just can’t stop looking.”
—jonathan schwartz, looking at the stockroom catalogs given to us by mister merlin

“I’m the only girl around here who likes to eat shit!”
—gio, our soon-to-be-ex-accountant, taken severely out of context

“you should really explain my eating shit really means eating the good kind of shit! or maybe it’s bad shit?  but good shit to me? oh never mind, it’s all shit at the end!”
—gio, our soon-to-be-ex-accountant, trying to explain her quote above

“hey, i don’t know who this is or this email. plus, take me off this cocksucking email list. email lists are gay. not two dudes gay, just gay.”
—wee man, in response to a mass-email sent by ehren mcghehey regarding a new email address

“if jackassworld was the titanic, he’d be the anchor.”
—seth casriel, regarding dimitry elyashkevich

“how did she know what you were gonna be wearing today?”
—jxpx blackmon to loomis fall, after opening his brand new portrait by sarah green