jackassworld

Lost in time somewhere in 2001, Wee Man and Preston Lacy were tossed into Wonkaland but the footage never came out of the dark chocolate sludge that lined the bottom of our show schedule boards. Yes, that’s right, we really did have big boards on the wall in the jackass production office (a studio lot which can, in fact, be seen in the opening sequence to Who Framed Roger Rabbit), where we frequently gathered about and stared in consternation, arguing and swapping about color-coded cards consisting of segments, bumpers, opens, and transitions, orchestrating the madness in a seemingly haphazard yet oddly controlled manner, much like the wayward grammatical structure of this sentence. All sloppy-ass English aside, though, these boards were crucial to the development of each and every jackass episode. Without them we surely would’ve been lost. I mean, imagine if the U.S. politicians and one warmonger in Dr. Strangelove didn’t have their “big board” in the war room. Why, they never would’ve known Slim Picken’s plane was still en route to the Soviet Union and its surprise Doomsday Device! Not only that, but the board’s absence would’ve wiped out one of the best dialog exchanges in the film—well, aside from the one when President Muffley calls up Dimitri, the Russian Premier, and Ambassador Desadeski first advises him, “Be careful Mr. President. I think he’s drunk,” but I think I may be partial to this latter conversation for more personal and work-related reasons.