jackassworld

It takes a lot for a man to go through life with a name like Billy Bob. You have to be cocksure, for sure. But it takes even more for a woman to go through life with a name like Billy Bob tattooed on her arm, meaning she must be damn sure of that cock (although apparently she wasn’t, because the name was long since eradicated from its former epidermal pole position). It does, however, take even more for someone like Steve-O to get the exact same Billy Bob tattoo in the exact same Billy Bob spot. And thank god he didn’t stop there.

While in Thailand on Wildboyz excursion circa 2005, Steve-O dragged Chris Pontius into the renowned tattoo parlor of Sompong Kanphai. His desire was to supplement his Billy Bob tattoo with another Jolie special, this time, however, with the trifecta bonus of it being (1) the exact same Cambodian Khmer mumbo-jumbo, (2) in the exact same upper left back spot, and (3) done by the exact same artist frequented and made pop-culturally popular by Jolie herself. For those of you who may not understand the native language of Cambodia, it reads:

“May your enemies run far away from you.
If you acquire riches, may they remain yours always.
Your beauty will be that of Apsara.
Wherever you may go, many will attend, serve and protect you, surrounding you on all sides.”

But that’s not the funny part. I never would’ve suspected it, but Sompong turned out to have some sense of humor. So rich, in fact, that when Pontius sat down to get the exact same Khmer tattoo as Steve-O and Jolie, Sompong decided to one up the American dicks and play a practical joke of his own by slinging an altogether different indelible inscription. Chris played it off well on-screen, but once he returned stateside he wasted no time at all in hitting up a tattoo removal specialist to start the long and splotchy process of lasering off that sombitch Sompong’s prank.

Bonus! Not only is it Billy Bob’s birthday today, but it’s also Doudou Ndoye’s and Dingdong Dante’s. Seeing these two names now almost makes me feel better about the somewhat unknown transexual we surnamed “Ging Dongporn” in another Thai escapade of the Wildboyz at the Golden Dome Cabaret in Bangkok.