jackassworld

Usually this column starts out with some random nonsense and office bullshit, but with the majority of the staff sitting on the couches right now watching soccer on the TV, well, things are kind of subdued. Not even a good fart to speak of, aside from some NAMBLA-like musings about little boys accompanying the men onto the pitch. Today is, however, a rather special day indeed, as it’s Steve-O’s birthday. Hence that pretty picture of him in a party dress (okay, it’s really borrowed from the Wildboyz “Russian Ballet” segment). Anyway, from all of us here in the office, happy birthday, O, and we’d also like to extend that very same well wishing to Ryan Dunn, seeing as his birthday was this past Wednesday and someone (Mike G.) neglected to remind us.

All right, now onto the nonsense that comprises our world here. This past Wednesday jackassworld live returned to the site and what a return it was. Jeff Tremaine was the “official” guest, but Rick Kosick wound up stealing all the thunder with his amazing slam during the warm-up “skate race” heats in the office (Mike G. did manage to catch this on video, so I’ll now take back what I’d insinuated about him in the preceding paragraph). Look for the replay to post this Saturday along with two other somewhat related videos pertaining to some gifts we received in the mail from our resident UK community member Michelle.

In bigger news, Johnny Knoxville posted a blog on his profile the other day that seriously—yes, even we go there on occasion—addressed the future of jackassworld. In short, we need to significantly up the daily visitors to this site and we’re now reaching out to you, the community, to help spread the word about our existence. Yes, apparently there are a butt ton of people out there in the world that have no idea we’ve set up a silly camp here on the Internet. So we’re now enlisting an informal army of guerrillas and we’d like you to be one our underground grassroots marketeers. That’s right, you. Why you? Because you appear to genuinely enjoy jackassworld as much as we enjoy making it. So arm yourself accordingly and carpet-bomb the masses with our stupid message. Go bananas with the banners and trailer on your myspace, facebook, or personal blogs. Embed the videos. Swap cyber shit and share our funny with friends and family via email. For the old school DIY-types, post up flyers in local establishments or take those silly stickers of ours and stick them where the sun shines and people are liable to notice. As a member of the highly unofficial “Jackassworld Liberation Front,” or JLF for short (not to be confused with the JLA, although both groups do take a certain fancy to form-fitting spandex outfits), you represent the future of our site. Make us proud.

After months of mentioning and alluding to it, the jackassworld art competition is officially on with numerous entries already uploaded to the site. Check out the selection of work thus far here and vote for those you take a liking to. The cast and crew is SUPPOSED to refrain from any voting until after the general election is done, but The Wolf Den® done went and fucked that up already. Reminder, anyone caught making fake profiles for voting purposes will not only get their pee-pee (or fanny) slapped, they’ll be publicly outted and ineligible for any prize winnings.

Random shit that pertains to our asses: The Citrus Report recently posted an interview with Dave Carnie, in which he talks about Big Brother, jackassworld, food, drink, cats and magazines. Yesterday, Supreme released a set of skateboard decks designed by me—sorry, just can’t do that third person shit right now—but apparently they’ve all since sold out (455 decks were produced of each design, so check eBay for all those speculative bastards reselling them in an embarrassingly overpriced manner). Dave England continues to rally around the Ojai skate park cause and helped put together a benefit art show entitled “Mixed Message” that opens with the usual party deal on June 28 at The Village Jester in Ojai, CA. Ray Barbee will be performing live that night with artwork on display (and for sale) by Andy Mueller, Chris Pastras, Clint Peterson, Craig Stecyk, Desiree Astorga, Don Pendleton, Grant Brittain, Kris Markovich, Ryan Gee, Wes Humpston, Dave, and myself.

Next week on jackassworld, more crap. We’ll also have an interview with the Three 6 Mafia, the return of Rick Kosick’s “Stun Collar” from the jackass archives, and a new installment of Knoxville’s “One Bourbon, One Scotch, and One Beer” with Lemmy from Motörhead. And don’t forget to watch NBC’s Celebrity Circus next Wednesday night and to vote for Wee Man.