jackass – eddie’s auto

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Back in 2001, I visited Johnny and his family in Knoxville, Tennessee. They were all so nice to me considering I was the first Jew to step into their home. Perhaps Johnny brought his lawyer or accountant there later, but I’m sure I was the first. On that trip, we shot at Eddie’s Auto, a local auto parts store run by Eddie “It ain’t nuthin’ for me to whoop a man’s ass” Harvey. The idea was to go in there and piss off a senior citizen, and I was against this from the beginning. It’s really easy for me to get under someone’s skin and I’ll do it to anyone except old people. My grandmother was a big part of my life and seniors are old! I mean they could go at anytime. What if I gave poor old Eddie a heart attack? I went in there with a spy-cam in my glasses and eventually got him hot enough for a coronary. What a dick!

—Dimitry Elyashkevich