guitar zapped hero

Derek Freda is an avid fan and quite the accomplished player of the hit video game G****r H**o (I’m not allowed to name the guitar controller game, because there’s a lawsuit between MTV and the guys that invented G****r H**o or something). This gaming experience leaves the player in a trance, focusing all their senses on the screen with all peripheral early warning systems functioning on a Helen Keller deaf-blind level (comparable to a Wolfie high-alert level of warning). Derek was just trying to blow off some steam, but instead he got a well-deserved zap to the tuchas. What a guitar zero!

—Dimitry Elyashkevich

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